Moving with love

I thought to follow yesterdays post with another 'home' announcement, as its directly related to my art practice and life.

We have decided to sell our Germantown property. www.gtowncrib.blogspot.com

This decision was sudden and took us by surprise but feels incredibly light and wonderful in nature. As you all know, the past two years of my life have been flooded with changes, changes that others may never experience in one life. Death, birth, new home, finances, work,etc.
During this time, I sat in what has felt like a cave of darkness, just trying to breath. After what seemed life many lifetimes, I began to see glimmers of light.
The darkness and pointed light has led to deep inward reflection. A gift.
As I sit with myself, a 33yr old-Artist, Mother, Wife, Sister, Daughter, Woman I realize that I have been running away from myself and the circumstances I've never had any control over. I have been running to achieve, to have, to be, to succeed, to be something other then who I always have been.
I have always been an artist, I have always been an intelligent, kind-hearted, creative being who loves much.
Now, I want to revel and explore the fullness of my truest self, being an artist. I want to sit with myself, looking inward and outward, expressing love.
I want to dedicate my life to my artistic practice and fill it with open space to explore, expand and love more.
So, following our hearts (its a family decision) we have decided to let go of the extra loads that demand our attention and need our care, and start again so we may be closer to our joy. We are not sure exactly whats next, possibly Italy? What I am certain of is that I will put my art in front of the line, not lastly, or when I have more money or more time.
My art will be my money, and where my time is spent.
Our beautiful dream home will go up on the market this week, as we realize our dreams:)
PS. I am a great investment, and am accepting benefactor applications:)

Imagine

"She imagined being the one who kissed the grass in the morning leaving the sweet dew that swept the farmers field, she imagined her hair blanketing the earth, her tears watering each flower, her voice the echo of every love note. As she imagined loveliness so large it extended into galaxies beyond our world, she began to feel very far from her body.
She began to imagine herself as a bear, as a mermaid, as the sunshine, as a cupcake. She started laughing, thinking of her family eating her for lunch! Then she started crying thinking how her family may not recognize her without her body."

Cure

"There's Nothing Ahead"-Rumi

"Stretch your arms and take hold the cloth of your clothes with both hands.
The cure for the pain is in the pain.
Good and bad are mixed. If you don't have both, you don't belong with us."

Today, I bandaged a broken skateboard, gilded a bone and a shoe heel, bought a bunch of helium balloons and someones wedding dress, watered my paintings, picked up 22 of the most horribly painted canvas from some unknown artist...and contemplated my next creative endeavors.
As I looked around at my current projects, and ideas...I heard myself saying:

"I bet all your blog and art followers are thinking what happened to this girl? "Where are her beautiful abstract landscape paintings? Looks like she had a head injury or something? All she does are these weird non-sensical things."

You know one of those really encouraging voices we have inside ourselves. But, then I thought about it, and there is some truth to it. The death of my beloved sister was and is an incredibly traumatic blow to my heart, and in turn my mind.
As a result my life and my art(heart) are affected.

The work I have been making lately has been alchemical in its properties. It has been more about the changing affects of perspective's...it has been about not being fully in control...it has been about seeing, living, loving, sharing, forgiving....

And as I read in this poem by Rumi today; "The cure for the pain is in the pain"

ALCHEMY- seemingly magical power or process of transmuting: "He wondered by what alchemy it was changed, so that what sickened him one hour, maddened him with hunger the next" (Marjorie K. Rawlings).

Golden Blessings

GOLDEN BLESSINGS

Daniel Seward

why are my keys covered in milk?why is my shampoo "for women of color"?where did my new hat go?what is that noise coming from the carrot?
(A small rubber toy carrot)

James Meadows

Son jumps on chest" I gotcha you ...i hug you baby sad...'
(a child safe lock)

Noavakay Knight

Come with me....
(A bouncy ball)

These are a few "Golden Blessings". It is a new project that is interactive and was inspired by a personal experience with heartbreak over black and blue parsnips. Yes, parsnips. I literally was in tears about the poor quality of parsnips offered at Hannaford Market. The disgusting quality of packaged parsnips spoke to me of the larger picture. How little love and care and nurture was given to these "tender n' sweet" (that's what the package said) parsnips. How can we live in a society that doesn't love and nurture what we consume and create. After a mini breakdown in the parking lot....I began to imagine how could I transform this, like alchemy...and I imagined that my tears were turning these parsnips in to little golden blessings. Like a fairy tale. I felt better, even though I had no idea what the blessing would be for?

A few days later I read an amazing passage in my book; 'Love Poems to God' by Rainer Maria Rilke

It said:

'No thing is too small for me to cherish and paint in gold, as if it were an icon that could bless us, though I'll not know who else among us will feel this blessing'

This reading was like reading my own mind, and it vocalized that I didn't need to know what the blessing was for.

So, I began my golden blessing project which is; I find these small discarded items when I walk...and then I match them to a person on Facebook, and sometimes I find the blessing first, and sometimes the person is in my head first that day..and what that person writes as their 'status' at that moment on Facebook becomes what the blessing is for or about. The person has no knowledge of these blessings, (until now).
I am thinking of these little golden blessings as little icons, or little magic things with alchemical properties of love and power to bless....

Along with this, I just made three little paintings that I planted seeds in. They are based on the same inspiration. that nothing is too small to cherish. Each day I will water these paintings, with love and we shall see....they are a bit of a meditation, reminding me of this principle that nothing is too small to cherish.

I am excited buy both of these projects as they both are interactive between me and nature, chance, and time.

The three little "planted" paintings with my eyedropper for watering

These 'planted' paintings are postcard size and the are made with encaustic, lentils, beans, gold leaf, paper towel, and transferred images of Haeckel's radiolarians.
(single cell marine life)

"Walking"

These are two photo's from a Public Art Performance I did yesterday.
(Later a video will be available to show)

The piece, "Walking" is part of a larger body of work called "Bird Girl Project". The "Bird Girl Project" is inspired by the life and death of my beloved sister, Summer Knight, it includes installations, paintings, video, and this performance...and who knows what else as I am creating whats in it now!

In "Walking" I tied 32 helium balloons to myself , and duct taped two large Belgian bricks to my feet, then I walked from my house down to the river, along the main st. of Hudson, NY.(aprox. 1.5miles) All of which was spontaneous, without any plan other then to walk wherever and as far as I wanted.

The performance is based on a part of a fairy tale I wrote for Summer, (Princess In The Clouds). In the story: she comes down from the clouds and the wise men, decide that the best way to keep her from flying to the sky is to attach bricks to her feet, but to guarantee that she doesn't sink into the ground they prescribe balloons to be tied to her shoulders. Everyone agrees that this is best, and so out of love and the desire to walk the earth in a flat and level way with her beloved ones, Princess Summer courageously follows her prescription. As gracefully as possible, she walks. Everyone pretends like they either don't notice the slow sluggish drag, or her bumps and lumps. Eventually this remedy, becomes too much to bear.

I decided that I wanted to experience and share what I imagined.

The "Bird Girl Project" is opening my mind and process as an artist. I am allowing myself to broaden what I create, so that I may release and realize inspiration in whichever form it fits. Its quite amazing and empowering to say yes, and open the door........